blunk182:

DATING TIP: Hold the door for your date. Rip the door off its hinges. Use the door as a weapon to fight off other men. Establish dominance.

(via officialdaddyegbert)

76,343 notes

peperomint:

when u dislike a song on an 8tracks but u dont dislike it enough 2 waste a skip on it so u just gotta suffer thru

(via dirkfromstatefarm)

26,768 notes

richard-sp8-jr:

when i was in kindergarten i had this babysitter who cooked the best steak i’d ever had and i’d always ask what it was and she said “people” every time and i’d laugh and ask what it really was and she’d just reply “people” and i found out in first grade that she got arrested and was sentenced to 50 years-life in prison

and that’s the story about how my babysitter was basically hannibal lecter and i was will graham for a whole year

(Source: jumpingjaverts, via lithelyliving)

222,541 notes

2srooky:


contra-indication:

sramister:

Our Band director wasn’t at school.

what is it about band kids everywhere that, when left alone, we all do the same thing and build forts, thrones, and barricades in the band room?

Because you’re fucking nerds.

2srooky:

contra-indication:

sramister:

Our Band director wasn’t at school.

what is it about band kids everywhere that, when left alone, we all do the same thing and build forts, thrones, and barricades in the band room?

Because you’re fucking nerds.

(via leviohsaw)

72,592 notes

rumpelstiltskln:

if I had a twin I would go into crowds of strangers and profess my love to someone and then say “if our love isn’t meant to be, I will go back in time and slap myself” and then my twin would burst in and slap me

(via faygo-fuckyourself)

213,777 notes

did-you-really-just:

spiritcreator:

potatofreek:

penis-hilton:

hugcartel:

why is the mom telling her daughter she’s ready to shave?

why is the mom calling her daughter mom

maybe they are each other’s moms



IM ON MOBILE AND I KNEW WHAT IT WAS BEFORE I OPENED THE IMAGE

did-you-really-just:

spiritcreator:

potatofreek:

penis-hilton:

hugcartel:

why is the mom telling her daughter she’s ready to shave?

why is the mom calling her daughter mom

maybe they are each other’s moms

image

IM ON MOBILE AND I KNEW WHAT IT WAS BEFORE I OPENED THE IMAGE

(via faygo-fuckyourself)

106,555 notes

brook:

the sexual tension between you and a game still in its plastic wrap

(via thecoffeetables)

88,113 notes